[audience laughing] You wanna initial my cast?”, I saw another thing on the sports highlights. High 68F. Eventually, of course, he did make it through the bit to great applause and further shouted requests. They give you a card? Your current subscription does not provide access to this content. Posted on March 12, 2018 by scottl. You turn on your TV, the police chief’s there. He missed the tag! But my clients wanna build a building that’s 700 feet. Two more bits.

Not a beach thing, I won’t allow it.” “Who allows you to be the guy who’s allowing things?” “It has to be a common-sense beach thing, moron. Hug the post!” If you don’t hug the post, some worm family: [shouting gibberish] [singing] Worm people are on the planet [audience laughing] It happened anyway. [audience laughing] Can I go to a city council meeting, “Um, I’m tired of stopping at red lights”? And I swear the sportscaster said, “The driver suffered a broken toe.” I could understand him saying, “All they could find was the driver’s toe.” [audience laughing] And it was broken. And when it was a strike, I thought your chest might explode.” [audience laughing] It’s a hard job.

And my guess is he tells that story more often than I do. She gets on the mic, “Ladies and gentlemen, we have a wonderful day here with all these graduates. Good luck! Thank you for signing in! You all enjoy the conservatory.

FCC Public File | For assistance accessing public files, contact Brian's first one-hour special, Standing Up, debuted on Comedy Central on June 10, 2007. I have to pee.” And he goes, “Deal with it. You have permission to edit this article. We hope that you continue to enjoy our free content. The way we played Mouse Trap is we’d try to guess how far we would get into the setup process… before we got frustrated and threw everything back in the box. Before we wrap up, I have a final proposal for the city council. “Oh, we got a new driver. Mike is our oldest brother. He was the liaison for NBA teams, the player summer league and directed the highly successful summer basketball camps. People think I’m smart and gracious. Tennis is weird. My mom and dad are wonderful. I don’t know why players argue with umpires. Good night. And I can only imagine you’ve already discussed this, but… instead of that, why not zero, one, two, three, four?” [chuckles] “Okay, Charlie. ", Based on his incredible success, one could easily claim that comedian Brian Regan is one of …, Comedian Brian Regan is beloved by Utah audiences (he's sold out shows at various arenas across the state). [mimics motor revving] “Hop on.” Okay. I’m like, “Can we rig up a footstool and a pulley system?” [audience laughing] I finally get behind him, and I notice he doesn’t have a back bar. Required fields are marked *. “Give me the ball back, I hit it into the net. That encourages people who play three times in their whole life. Give him a run. I have enough money… to buy Tater Tots… [audience laughing] for the rest… of my life.

[email protected] | FCC Applications [audience laughing] Hit a bucket with a ball in it, so, boot, bucket, ball. Push this button. I think when you hear that term, “boots on the ground,” you assume that means soldiers in those boots. I’m expecting paper hats and a guy slinging dogs. Um… I was on the road recently, and I was hungry, and I passed a place that said, “Mr.

It’s broken. I did not wanna throw that interception. Please log in, or sign up for a new account to continue reading. Promotional Rates were found for your code. Seattle native Carol Channing is dead at 97…some details about the 50th anniversary Woodstock concert are coming out…and you can buy some of Marilyn Monroe’s hair!

In 2004, Regan self-released a DVD of his performance at the Irvine Improv, titled I Walked on the Moon. I didn’t wanna say something, “I beat you!” It’s okay. [cheering and applause] [audience laughing] Just as far as I could humanly hurl. “Okay. This feels inappropriate somehow.” I don’t think they meant anything by it, but… same thing when I was in Toronto at the Blue Jays game and… their fans were going: -[mimics bird chirping] -[audience laughing] I don’t think they meant anything by it. Cloud of dust and a heigh-ho.

in National, Trending. A few times Regan referred to his penchant for really only skimming headlines to get his information. I was in the stands at the Braves game, everybody was going: [chanting] [panting while chanting] A bunch of overweight white people: “Give me another Big Gulp! It shoots out four inches? Regan resides in Pittsburgh with his wife, Catherine, and their two children, Sophia and Brendan. Seattle native Carol Channing is dead at 97…some details about the 50th anniversary Woodstock concert are coming out…and you can buy some of Marilyn Monroe’s hair! But you know what they haven’t tried? [9] It was released as a video/audio album in Feb 2016. And then just grabbed her purse and just whipped it into some distant flowerbed watching Disney receipts slowly descend back down to Earth. Problem solved. That hurt and felt nice. Ten, so say the random gods. I get to travel. You get a mulligan every serve? He’s like, “They’re gonna be mad.” I was like, “Eh.” I didn’t know what else to contribute. I read recently, absolute truth, they said Kim Jong-un is considering outlawing sarcasm in North Korea. If a place even has a conservatory, blow that pop stand. If you get your first shot in, he’ll go, “You got 15.” “No, that’s not possible. Alcoholism, drug abuse, gambling addictions. All rights reserved. At our level, if we don’t like somebody, we say like, “Hey, I don’t like you.” At that level, they’re nice for four minutes, and on the fifth minute, they kick them in the teeth. [audience laughing] It was fan chirp-off night. We’re– We’re top of the food chain? So, why would you waste your time? he asked incredulously. And they put it in a splint and helicopter it off to a trauma center. I wish I’d have said, “Excuse me. Here are 10 of our favorite Regan …. I don’t like conflict. I think they should be required to show the proof. This time, I said something. [laughter and applause] I don’t know if you’ve ever peed out of the back of a station wagon at 60 miles an hour, but there’s a surprise involved. [audience laughing] “Do you know how fast you were going?” “Do you know why you like eating donuts? Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the “woke” white women. I don’t understand North Korea’s public relations program. EEO Report | You put on a few pounds, put on your underwear, you bend over, and your waistband flips down. Maybe he’s the voice of reason. On your next view you will be asked to log in to your subscriber account or create an account and subscribepurchase a subscription to continue reading. I’m seeing jackets and ascots.

I wonder where they came from. Regan was always a fan of Steve Martin, The Smothers Brothers and Johnny Carson.[3].

[audience laughing] That’s a prize? The other day, I put on my underwear, I didn’t even have to bend over. Guess what joke’s gonna be fixed. I’ve only got 25 pounds to go. More 4:00 Funnies. He just squeezes up the other side, says, “Well, I guess we’re up here now.” That’s what you guess? It’s tough.” I said, “Mike, I’m serious. [audience laughing] My mom is one of the most wonderful men that I’ve ever– Wonderful people. You know what kills me? He thinks little numbers is better than all that.” ‘Cause that leads nowhere. I am very honored by that. I have zero.” “You have love.” [gasps] “It don’t feel like it.” [audience laughing] Why do you say it like that? [audience laughing] Yeah. Please log in, or sign up for a new account and purchase a subscription to continue reading.



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